Searching for unicorns

Faith can be like searching for the elusive herd of unicorns you are sure must exist. That one day you’ll discover, upon your hike in the mountains, in the shadows of the forest, a meadow full of them, all glowing brightly and majestically within the darkness emanating a sense of happiness and calm.

Finding the unicorns, however, would be the END of the journey and faith is apparently not about the end of the journey but the journey itself. It is what you need to keep on keepin’ on within the journey. 

And sometimes the journey can suck and all you want is to just find the herd of unicorns, so you have that light, calm and happiness in the suckiness so that it will just go away. What you end up realizing is not that the light, calm and happiness come from the unicorns themselves, but rather, the faith in the unicorns somehow provides those qualities in you. 

So you keep searching for the unicorns. You know you may not ever find them, but the idea that they exist, cause you to keep your faith in them. 

The journey of faith is hard. It wavers. You doubt. Actually finding the unicorns seems impossible. So out of reach. The belief in unicorns is just silly and lame and who are you? How are you worthy of finding something as fantastic and lovely as unicorns? 

But along your journey  you find a hoofprint that is not like any other hoofprint. It somehow is more pronounced and the silvery, shimmery residue within it convinces you of the existence of unicorns. The path the hoofprint takes you on seems lighter and airy. You can breathe. You smile more. The weight on your shoulders is less, because the hoofprint affirms the evidence of your ridiculous faith. 

While following the meandering path, you may trip and fall. Damn it can hurt. It can cause you to just stay on the ground and cry for a bit. But you get back up and resume your journey, knowing the journey guided by unicorns is safer than one not. 

Sometimes the path takes you roundy roundies and the scenery doesn’t seem to vary and you question what the heck is going on and simply don’t understand the route. This causes you to get frustrated and mad and scream in the air. But afterwards, you harness the calm that you somehow possess because you are confident of your unicorn guide.

Sometimes you are thirsty. Hungry. Wearily tired. So you take a sip or five of water. It re-energizes you, like words of encouragement. You eat some nibbles. This sustains you, like enjoying laughter. You take a snooze. Maybe a long one. This reinvigorates you, like a long hug from someone you love and who loves you.  

The worst, however, is that the journey can be lonely.  This can make you cry and feel an achiness in your chest down into your gut. Eventually, you find that you are able to be content just knowing the unicorn is out there guiding you and the achiness becomes non-existent except for the occasional moments here and there. Every once in awhile, a special someone comes along and joins you on your journey making it more interesting, fun and meaningful. Sometimes they have to follow a different path for awhile, but the ones you truly connect with always end up re-joining you again and again. Some are just along for a moment or two, but you learn something from each person who joins you on your journey. 

Some believe in the elusive herd of unicorns, just like you. Some don’t. Some are lost and the compulsion to help them on their journey is intense. You want them to truly believe in the unicorns. To truly have faith in the journey, like you do, because it fills the journey with increased moments of joy and contentment. However, sometimes, helping the lost when you are not really the guide causes you to become lost, too.

When you discover you were sidetracked by wanting so desperately to convince them of unicorns, you end up frantically searching for the hoofprints to guide you again. For a time they might be just like the unicorns themselves, the evidence of them being elusive. You want to give up hope, but something inside you says to keep looking. That you will find them again. That the unicorns won’t let you stay lost for long. They want you to find them. To take comfort in the belief of their existence. And you do find them and are once again on the correct path. 

Remember, the path isn’t straight. There are many obstacles to overcome. Searching for unicorns is a bumbling in faith. And that’s ok. It’s not meant to be without the bumbles. One day, my journey will be over, as it will for all of us. Only then will I find the elusive herd of unicorns and be so glad I followed their hoofprints because it was the only way to truly enjoy the journey.